Perfectly Imperfect!

One of the things I find myself regularly chatting about with my clients, (and anyone else who will listen) is why it’s so important to give up trying to be perfect.

Perfectionism is the enemy of happiness as it is simply impossible to achieve. Pursuing perfection is a fast track to a constant sense of failure, disappointment, frustration and low self esteem. And, it’s a huge waste of energy.

A quick look at perfect on www.dictionary.com makes this abundantly clear:

Perfect -

• conforming absolutely to the description or definition of an ideal type
• excellent or complete beyond practical or theoretical improvement
• entirely without any flaws, defects, or shortcomings

I don’t know anyone who fits that description, do you?

A flaw or imperfection in a diamond or precious gem is called an inclusion. So rather than think of your flaws as problems that need to be resolved, think of them as your own personal inclusions… the things that make you unique.

Focus on being the best you can be and accept that while you may never be perfect, you can be brilliant in your own unique way.

October Newsletter - Video Message

Here is the video version of my October Newsletter

- I would love your feedback....

Bringing your holiday home...

Last week I was on holidays with my husband, daughter, sister-in-law and her partner and my parents-in-law in Provence.*

We had been here less than a day when that familiar feeling of ‘I want to stay here forever’ came over me. Now as you can see, the place really was divine, but in honesty, do I want to spend the rest of my days living in a one street town in rural France…. No, that’s not what I want from life at all. An extended holiday yes, a life in the country…. not for this city slicker.

But the feeling of wanting to stay on holiday forever is one we’ve all experienced, and before you dismiss it, there are some important insights you can uncover. Next time you return from holiday, rather than thinking ‘oh well, I can’t stay here forever, I’d better get back to my real life’, ask yourself what experiences or feelings from your holiday can be retained (with a little effort) when you return.

Here are some of the insights from our group:

• Start your day gently in a relaxed and gentle way
• Read more for pleasure and relaxation, not just to keep ‘on top of things’
• Spend more quiet time on your own
• Have more dinners and social times with family & friends
• End the day gently; going to bed before becoming absolutely exhausted
• Worry less… about everything!

The meal of the holiday was my Tarte aux Poireaux (Leek Tart).

You can check out my recipe here.

*Six adults, one child…the perfect ratio for a relaxing holiday!

Feeding the people you love – Tarte aux Poireaux

As you may already know, in true Italian style, one of my favourite past times is ‘feeding the people I love’.

Whilst here in Provence, I made a Tarte aux Poireaux (Leek Tart) that was such a hit, it was requested for lunch on Wednesday, dinner on Thursday and lunch on Friday!

I thought I’d share my recipe here:

Tarte aux Poireaux

(serves 6)

Ingredients-

1 packet ready rolled short crust pastry (look for one with real butter not nasty transfats!)

6 large leeks/10 small leeks

100g butter

150ml white wine (wine left over from the night before is perfect)

1 cup finely grated cheese preferably emmental or gruyere cheese

150ml full fat crème fraiche (or soured cream)

4 eggs

1tsp Dijon mustard

1 large clove garlic crushed

Pastry –

Preheat oven to 180C. Grease a 20 x 30 cm baking tray (chose a tray with 1.5cm sides or use a baking dish but trim the pastry at 1.5cm. Flour your surface and roll your pastry until it is only 3mm thick. Fit the pastry to the baking tray and place in the fridge for 10minutes to chill

(5 mins in the freezer will have the same effect).

Remove the pastry from the fridge and bake for 10 minutes. When the pastry is this thin, there is no need to blind bake, just prick the surface all over with a fork. Remove from the oven and leave to stand – don’t worry if the pastry is not fully cooked yet, you are just giving it a helping hand.

Filling –

Slice the leeks into 1cm rounds and rinse, ensuring any sand or grit is removed. Don’t dry the leeks after rinsing the extra moisture will help them to soften. Melt the butter in a large fry pan or pot. Add the leeks and garlic and sauté on a low heat for 5mins Add the wine and continue to sauté on a low heat until the leeks are soft, but not brown (approx 10 minutes).

Combine the eggs, crème fraiche and mustard until smooth. Add the cheese and leak mixture and stir until you have a thick leak mixture. Spoon the mixture into the baking dish, spreading evenly add a little grated cheese on the top. Bake on 180C for 20 mins or until golden.

Serve with a green salad and an crisp white wine (you can always use what’s left over for tomorrow’s tarte!)

Bon Appétit

What I learned today…. In conversation with Kirsty Spraggon

I have received some wonderful feedback over the last week about my new radio show Real Women/Real Success. If you didn’t catch this week's show you can listen to it or download it to iTunes here... or visit Blog Talk Radio

My guest today was Kirsty Spraggon, author of Work As If You Own It and an expert on building relationships for life and business success. I just loved chatting with Kirsty!

Here are some of the insights that from our conversation that particularly resonated with me:

• Success is like climbing up a mountain. If you keep putting one foot in front of the other, you will eventually get to the top.
• Successful people still feel overwhelmed, intimidated or downright scared about the path they are pursing, they just don’t let that get in their way.
• Stop trying to find work life balance and instead focus on FURK – combining FUn with woRK.
• Think about the relationships you are building as a long term investment in your success. They might not lead to new business today or tomorrow, but if you nurture them the will be valuable to you in the long term.
• Be yourself at work, give people a chance to see the real you. Authenticity is about people wanting something real from something genuine.

And, a great comment Kirsty shared after our show… ‘Success is like building Ikea furniture. It might cause you all sorts of frustration as you build it but will feel incredibly satisfying when you look back and made that myself!’

A former real estate agent who achieved global Top 1% status with RE/MAX Kirsty now works as a coach, consultant and speaker, assisting people to increase sales, networks and connections for life and business success.

To find out more about Kirsty visit www.kirstyspraggon.com.au

Little sacrifices, big results...

I was reading an article in the Sunday papers about Shakira who, in case you haven’t heard, is a Latin American pop sensation and the fourth richest woman in music


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During the interview, she was talking about a strict diet she was currently on, all fish and vegetables, and explained “You want to be skinny and have a good body? You have to workout every day and say no to certain foods.” When her interviewer commiserates, Shakira shrugs and says “You can’t achieve anything in life without a small amount of sacrifice.”

In this instance Shakira was talking about her body, but it is a sentiment she repeats throughout the interview, and one that I wholeheartedly agree with.

“You can’t achieve anything in life

without a small amount of sacrifice.”

So often people expect achieving their goals and dreams to be easy, requiring the bear minimum of effort on their behalf. But that’s rarely the way it works. Most success, whatever the goal, is the result of constant and continuous effort and a willingness to make these make compromises and small sacrifices along the way.*

Think about the goals you want to achieve and ask your self what small sacrifice or compromise can I make that will take me closer to my dreams. Commit yourself fully and watch your future unfold.

Remember, achieving what you want in life won’t always be easy but it will be worth it!

* If you want to be a pop star with a hot bod, saying no to chocolate will probably seem like a small sacrifice. I am of course much relieved that this is not my goal as saying no to chocolate would be more than I can bear!

Read the full article about Shakira here

What I learned today…. In conversation with Karen Miles

This morning was the first episode of my new radio show Real Women/Real Success.

You can listen to the show or download it to iTunes at Blog Talk Radio

My guest today was Karen Miles, the author of The Real Baby Book You Need at 3am and an expert on motherhood and it’s impact on women’s identity and career. Karen and I had a great chat.

Here are some of the insights that I took away from our conversation:

• Women are setting themselves up for failure as mothers, right at the start, with the concept of the ‘birth plan’. The baby has the plan, not you!
• It’s important as a working mother to reinsert yourself into the equation, considering yourself and your needs doesn’t make you selfish
• Juggling is something that clowns do really well, and not something that people do particularly well
• Focus on work life mix – what’s in your day that fulfils you professionally personally, as a mother and so on
• Invest in yourself and your key relationships
• Create clear delineation between working time and family time
• Get back to You First Thinking; back your instincts, back your needs and back yourself as a person.

Karen is also the founder of Miss Scarlett, an online stationery boutique that creates gorgeous cards for time-savvy mums who want the option to email their cards.

www.karenmiles.com.au

www.missscarlett.com.au